[they're all terrible at secrets, really. but the longer gansey stayed on that car, the easier it was to withdraw into himself, to just read through his journal over and over looking for new clues, or stare out the window at the blurry scenery. the closer they'd gotten to glendower, the less gansey wanted to share it. his purpose was already slipping through his fingers and into the control of his friends, who are all so much more than he is.

he doesn't say any of this, of course, because it's hardly important right now.]

How bad is arrow girl going to freak out if you show up with a weapon? Because you might prefer it, but I'd prefer you not getting hurt while we don't have any access to medical facilities. That goes for everyone. Once we get back on the train, we can't watch each other's backs anymore.

[this is a gansey they should all recognize, the one who would rather plan than risk.

noah's solidity is proven by the fact that the shove rocks him back into gansey, who sways and looks at ronan like he understands. noah being so real and also holding onto him like a lost child leaves gansey feeling particularly odd. they aren't both meant to be alive at the same time, but here they are.]